Few things can cause such a loss of confidence and trust in a companion due to infidelity. The pain of being betrayed ripples through the relationship or marriage, affecting the one who’s been betrayed. As for the person who had the affair, they may be left wondering if their mistake will ever be forgiven. There is a way to recover from infidelity and a way to prevent it from ever happening. Have you considered therapy for betrayal, infidelity, affairs, and cheating?
What Is Infidelity?
The dictionary will tell you that infidelity is the “action or state of being unfaithful to a spouse or other sexual partner.” You know it’s not as simple as that. Infidelity can take many forms, some never requiring a moment of physical intimacy. Infidelity is a betrayal. A trauma. Infidelity hurts those directly involved eventually.
Why Is Infidelity A Betrayal?
Have you ever wondered why an affair hurts so much? It’s because you love that person and trust them with the entirety of your being. Even when there are problems within a relationship or marriage (and let’s face it, minor conflicts are very common), love is unconditional. Yet, when that love that you thought was shared and held as something sacred is met with disloyalty and secrets? It inflicts the worst kind of pain.
Infidelity of any kind, be it adultery or cheating, or an emotionally charged relationship, opens a rift between the Trust and Love you built together with your partner.
Why Would You Need Therapy For Infidelity?
Because affairs rock the foundation of even the strongest, happiest marriages, everyone involved will feel something. Confusion, anger, frustration, sadness… you’re going to run through the whole emotional gamut. But those feelings won’t easily disappear. Infidelity isn’t a white lie that can get swept under the carpet.
Talking with an infidelity recovery therapist, marriage counselor, or couples therapist can help. Therapists who are trained in affair recovery are supportive of both sides. They are an unbiased party who understands how both individuals felt about the infidelity, and they can offer up advice on how to discuss what happened openly.
Therapy helps clarify two things: a pathway towards infidelity recovery and how to reach a stronger relationship. Any unhealthy patterns within the relationship will be brought to light. Past traumas will be examined. If there has been codependency, abuse, repeated offenses with cheating and affairs, or other struggles, those too can be resolved through therapy.
Moreover, you can choose between individual and couples counseling. Going as an individual can help you confront any struggles within yourself. Perhaps you have developed PTSD from the betrayal and need to work through that. An infidelity therapist (or therapy in general) walks you through the healing process, so you can walk away from the incident with confidence.
Can Therapy Help Avoid Infidelity?
There are many reasons why someone may cheat. For instance, some individuals find their current marriage boring or unfulfilling. This is something to address with a therapist. If you are compelled to cheat on your spouse or partner, know that it’s not a justifiable course of action. No matter how tired, angry, hurt, lonely, or unfulfilled you might be, betraying your partner or spouse is wrong.
Instead of seeking validation elsewhere, attend therapy. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), for example, can help you figure out the reasons you are driven to cheat. One-on-one therapy or even couples therapy can help you discover the reasons for your dissatisfaction with your current marriage and relationship. You can even learn how to communicate with your partner better, thereby counteracting whatever negativity you feel.
What Is The Recovery Process For Affairs And Cheating?
If you want to save your marriage or relationship after an affair, it’s possible with therapy. The first step is to contact a professional. Infidelity recovery specialists can help you reconcile. While the recovery process is long—many experts agree it takes around 2 years—it is something you won’t regret.
Within therapy, you can improve your communication skills, increase your tolerance for conflict, have honest conversations with your partner, and come to accept your role in infidelity.
The therapist will walk you through the trauma. Loss, grief, and feelings of hopelessness are common when you’ve been betrayed. This is the first phase of recovery.
Once you can handle the emotions, you move on to examining what led to the affair. Understanding the reasons behind the affair, as well as gaining a sense of closure, can do wonders for a relationship. However, this is incredibly difficult without receiving therapy.
As problems are addressed, you and your partner will start working on building a new relationship. Things will never go back to how they were before the affair. Hopefully, through therapy and resolving old issues, this new relationship will be something better, stronger, and healthier.
Is Individual Or Couples Therapy Better For Infidelity?
Sometimes, you may decide you need individual therapy before, during, or after couples therapy. Other times, only one partner begins individual therapy, especially if the relationship is rocky.
No matter how you look at it, therapy is helpful to whoever attends. Individual therapy can stop someone from making the wrong move. Those with sex addictions or dissatisfaction work to absolve those problems. Meanwhile, anyone who is traumatized from past relationships or betrayals can confront their fears in a safe environment.
In couples counseling, the main goal is to strengthen communication between you and your spouse. The root cause of the infidelity, as well as the roles you both played, are examined. Therapists use the sessions to help you reestablish trust and love, and they help you recommit to your marriage.
Therapy for betrayal, infidelity, and cheating is out there if you know where to look. If you are struggling after an affair, or if you want help with rebuilding a relationship then therapy is where you begin. Couples Academy is one program that can help. With lessons and tools designed by an infidelity recovery specialist and marriage counselor, you can obtain valuable skills for building trust and intimacy. Give us a call today to learn more about our services.