Couples Academy

Why Do People Cheat On The Ones They Love?

Why Do People Cheat On The Ones They Love

Why would someone cheat on a person they love? The answer is not simple. Love is intricate. It’s a crazy, winding road, and the way one person loves is quite different from the next. However, when it comes to cheating and other forms of infidelity, you may start to wonder if love even exists. Yes, it is possible to cheat or be cheated, even when you are madly in love. Today, we will explore some of the reasons that may drive someone to do such a thing.

What Does It Mean To Cheat?

Let’s begin by outlining what cheating means in this context, because, like love, cheating has many forms and definitions. Most often, people agree that cheating is the act of being physically intimate with someone who is not your partner. There is also emotional infidelity, which involves confiding or texting with someone or becoming romantically—not physically—involved with them.

The main thing is whether the person who cheated is intent on covering it up if they feel some guilt towards what they did. Betrayal is a no-no in any kind of relationship.


Why Do People On The One They Love?

Yes, people will cheat on the people that they love. It’s an undeniable fact. The betrayal hurts, and it can ruin even the strongest bond. What may be surprising is that some people cheat even when they are satisfied in their current relationship.

Here are some reasons why people may cheat on their partner or spouse:


1. Commitment Issues

Even if someone loves you, they may have commitment issues that tempt them to ruin what you have. Commitment issues make it difficult for someone to dedicate themselves to a single person. This does not mean that they do not love you; it means they are anxious about the relationship. Perhaps they have been in a traumatic relationship before and do not want to settle until those fears are resolved.

Unfortunately, commitment issues can often manifest in the worst of ways. Sometimes, people will resort to cheating to get out of a commitment, because they feel threatened. The only way to prevent commitment issues from transpiring into cheating is to visit a therapist, such as a couples counselor.

Attending therapy can get to the bottom of the experiences that led to the relationship anxiety and help the individual commit safely.


2. Neglect

Love is a garden that needs to be tended constantly. Think of rare, exotic flowers. Without nourishment, there is no way those flowers will survive in a cold climate. If you are neglected for a period of time, whether because of work or a long-distance relationship, you may seek warmth from someone else.

In such a situation, it is best to communicate with your partner about your needs. Otherwise, they may not realize they are being distant.


3. Unfulfilled Sexual Desires

Some people need more sex than others. In relationships where the desire is lopsided, it can cause some issues. Sexual satisfaction is an important part of a relationship because it means that certain needs are being met. Sadly, some people will look for others to satisfy their sexual desires. Cheating is not a solution to this, though.

It is best to be open and clear about what you need from your partner sexually.


4. Lack Of Intimacy

No, intimacy is not just sex. Intimacy is a tender touch on the shoulder, cuddling together on the couch, and sitting down for long, passionate conversations. When you stop being intimate, it opens up a gaping crevasse between the two of you. You may begin to feel lonely, neglected, or even suspicious of your partner. While intimacy does diminish over the years, it is important to work on maintaining your love.

If you are struggling with intimacy, it may be time to talk about it. You can also visit a marriage or couples counselor for some assistance. Having a guide will make it easier to discuss these matters without provoking an argument.


5. Boredom

In some instances, namely with chronic cheaters, infidelity is something they do for fun, and there is little you can do to stop it in this case. Some people also think that flirting with everyone around them is a pastime, but it’s not. If you notice your partner behaving this way, talk to them about it. Tell them that they are crossing the line and that you will not tolerate such behaviors in a committed relationship.


6. Low Self-Esteem

Many people have low self-esteem. Sometimes, people dislike themselves so much that they believe what they have—such as being in a relationship—is too good to be true. They may not feel they deserve what they have. On the other side of the coin, these individuals with low self-esteem may seek validation from more than their partner.

In order to feel better about themselves—or to prove themselves right—they end up cheating on the person they love.

Low Self-Esteem

7. Self-Discovery

Have you ever wished you could get to know yourself a little better? Maybe reclaim some youthfulness that may have been lost throughout the years? Well, for some people, this need for self-discovery and indulgence goes a bit too far. In order to feel adventurous and brave, they seek out someone new. Sometimes, this is brought on by unfulfilled desires, but it can also be caused by a midlife crisis.


8. Revenge

There are many cases of revenge cheating, where one person goes out and sleeps with someone to get back at a partner who betrayed them. In these instances, no matter how much you love one another, the relationship may be poisoned forever. Such toxic actions will fix nothing.


Get Stronger Together With Couples Academy

People often wonder if you can cheat on someone that you love deeply. The answer is neither yes nor no. Emotions—and people—are complicated. There are a number of reasons why someone may cheat on someone they love, including low self-esteem, loneliness, boredom, and desire. However, if you do love one another, these things do not have to mark the end of your relationship. With couples counseling from Couples Academy, you and your partner can rebuild your connection, making it stronger and purer. Get in touch with us today to learn more about our counseling services.